School Trip and Whatever Is (Not) Happening
I think the most beautiful way to keep existing after death is through the subconscious. Kind of a weird opening, huh? Weird. god i'm so corny
I'm starting to understand why authors choose to write kid's books. Maybe it's because their mind is so much more malleable? Now it sounds like I'm a freak. You can just, make them believe in anything. Of course, that would be a bit extreme. Though, I believe that some pieces of media can stick with you in your subconcious for the rest of your life. I don't seem to remember any of them. Maybe that's part of it, though. Every single thing you have seen can shape you into the person you are today and the things you don't remember affect you even more, I guess? Anyways. None of this is important. I just wanted to type shit lmao
I'm going to a water park this weekend! Today is Wednesday , so I still haven't prepared much.. I'm leaving this Saturday.
We're going for a class thingie. It's pretty cool!
Don't really know what else to say about it.
Shit has been so boring recently. I don't want to do anything, and I keep waking up later than usual. My failures don't feel bad anymore. I don't feel the drive to get better anymore, and I don't know what that means. I'm probably being the most dramatic piece of shit right now, but honestly that makes it funnier.
I don't know what it means when I don't want to talk to people. I've always thought that I like being alone. For some reason, now more than ever, I feel like I lied to myself. I hate the constants in my life.
Not to get into identity crisis territory or whatever the fuckk but honestly I have never known who I am. And I don't know how to put that into words at all. I feel as if I'm the scum of the earth, getting by barely existing, barely even moving every day, slithering in my own sweat and putrid self-pity to the same point in time. I have two friends. Ghostie and Herb. Both are from Discord, but I met them on TikTok three years ago. I don't know what they mean to me. I don't want to meet new people, I don't want to do new things. I don't feel the need to step out of my comfort zone, I don't feel the need to go out. Whew im gonna like drown in this shit
Anwyaysss guysss I'm gonna go likee. Read.. and then hate my way into tomorrow where i have to see my stupid classmates again... Yayyy....
i wish i could do something
the way i wrote this icks me the fuck out Why so many periods.... I needa stop perioding